Joy in the Journey

Everywhere we go, we hear talk of change. A new president, either party promising change. Changes that hopefully will help our failing economy. Changes in our personal lives...our jobs, our relationships, our health, our financial status, our home...and the list could continue forever. Because there is nothing so constant in life, as is change.

Our current Prophet, President Thomas S. Monson spoke in our General Conference address last weekend about change. That is the inspiration for this post, as it has been on my mind since hearing him speak, and in the last few days numerous friends and family members have brought up this talk in conversation with me. I have been impressed that its something I really need to learn and understand.

President Monson said, "Throughout our lives, we must deal with change. Some changes are welcome; some are not. There are changes in our lives which are sudden, such as the unexpected passing of a loved one, an unforeseen illness, the loss of a possession we treasure. But most of the changes take place subtly and slowly."

Not one person is exempt from the inevitability of change. We are not alone in dealing with it...and we owe much of who we are, what we have and who we will become, to change. Without it, we could not learn and progress.

"Day by day, minute by minute, second by second we went from where we were to where we are now....Time never stands still; it must steadily march on, and with the marching come the changes." ~ President Monson

Each and every second...life is happening and if we think about how short this life really is, we would not want to waste any more of it. President Monson admonished, "Find joy in the journey- now."

He also quotes a line from the musical, The Music Man, “You pile up enough tomorrows, and you’ll find you’ve collected a lot of empty yesterdays.”

When I think of that line, it makes me think about how much of a procrastinator I can be. How often I tell myself, "One day." And how a lot of the time, that day has not come and probably will never come. Especially at my young age, I know I look toward the future a lot of the time to give me the things I wish for. And while I think it is wise to always be looking to the future and planning for things to come, we shouldn't be gazing off wistfully waiting for the future to happen. Before we know it, the future will be our past and we will have missed out on many of life's greatest gifts and treasures, looking for the ones we thought lay ahead for us in the future.

"There is no tomorrow to remember if we don’t do something today." ~ President Monson

Much of finding joy in our journeys has to do with learning from our past, but not dwelling on it. Especially upon things we cannot change. The other day I was looking at all of my daughters baby pictures. She'll be two next month...and I'm sad. I'll never have her as my little baby again. The thought brings tears to my eyes and I don't ever want to let her go. But, that change is inevitable. Dwelling on these unchangeable details will do nothing but cause me unnecessary sorrow. I need to relish in her adorable two-year-old-ness. I need to take advantage of my opportunities to teach her, love her, kiss her, hug her, cuddle her, read to her, play with her...etc. Because if I don't, I know I will blink and she will be 18 and ready for her own life.

Life is stressful. There is so much to think and worry about all the time. So much so, that a lot of the time we don't take the necessary opportunities to show love to others. Families pressed for time constraints due to extra curricular activities, meetings, homework, TV shows, etc... don't always take the time to have dinner with one another, talk and express the love they have for each other. While all of those things have their time and place in life, the importance of these relationships and the necessary time and effort needed to cultivate them, far outweighs any other obligations. Wrote William Shakespeare, “They do not love that do not show their love.” And President Monson added, "We will never regret the kind words spoken or the affection shown. Rather, our regrets will come if such things are omitted from our relationships with those who mean the most to us...Never let a problem to be solved become more important than a person to be loved."

No one wants to feel the regrets of it being too late to share how you felt. Said author Harriet Beecher Stowe, “The bitterest tears shed over graves are for words left unsaid and deeds left undone.” If we can't find the time to find the joy in our relationships with our loved ones, nothing else we do in this life will be worth anything. It's like the parent who goes to work all day to support their family, yet exhausts themselves beyond a point of functioning when returning home. While it is necessary to feed, clothe and shelter your family, it is just as necessary to nurture them with your love and presence. Family relationships, more than any other kind of relationship, must be cultivated. No amount of money will buy back the lost time and experiences.

We wait, everyday, anticipating change. I do it very much so myself. I love having something to look forward to. I don't think this is a bad thing, but only as long as it is within balance. We should look to the future for hope, but we should relish in our daily lives and be grateful for each day we are living. Things that I do today ARE the future. Today and now is the future of my life and they make a difference. And for this, I must be grateful.

President Monson also discussed the importance part gratitude plays in our lives. We must recognize and show our gratitude for the blessings in our lives. Blessings sometimes manifest themselves in ways we would not expect. I always think about this when I'm running late due to circumstances beyond my control, like red lights or a traffic jam. I think about how frustrated I am with being late, but that perhaps it is a blessing and the Lord is protecting me from an accident that could have happened. This is an extreme example, but I think we need to look more at our lives and the blessings within them. Always waiting for something bigger and better to happen is a slap in the face to the Lord who has blessed us so greatly. Unfortunately, sometimes we never understand how greatly blessed we are, until we lose it.

There is no time left in my life for complaint. There is no time left for waiting for things to happen. Inevitably, sorrows will come. We will all encounter trials in life...some that will seem unbearable. Somehow, we have to strive to find joy in the journey of it all.

I have a blessed life. One in which I can't even begin to understand how I was lucky enough to be given. I have led a joyous journey thus far and look to continue to find the joy in my everyday life.

One of my favorite quotes is from President Hinckley, "Life is to be enjoyed, not just endured." This quote sits on a plaque in my kitchen. It reminds me everyday that the Lord meant for me to find joy in this life. He has done his part in blessing me with those joys...it is then left up to me to find them and joy in them. My part is the easy part.

Change is inevitable and change is hard. Change is what makes this journey of life, life. And my goal is to find joy in that journey.

Be A Little Better

I just heard something someone said about me. It wasn't a good thing. Hearing it really stunk and hurt my feelings. Granted this person I'm sure never meant for me to hear, but that's a whole other story about making sure people we talk to are trustworthy. Nonetheless, you never like to hear when someone has something bad to say about you. It's inevitable that not everyone is always going to like you. The reality probably is, that people talk behind our backs more often than we think. Maybe I'd rather it have stayed behind my back than staring me in the face. Or then again, maybe not...



...because once I got over the initial reaction of defensive mode, and the "how dare you...you barely know me..." blah, blah...it actually really made me go inward and think. And I'm talking, I was getting ready in my bathroom and I caught my reflection in the mirror gazing off into oblivion forever. It really made me think about my character and who I am. After all, the comment wasn't even like, "she's ugly....or fat...or has a big nose"...in fact I almost felt like I'd welcome that comment first before one on my character. I came to the realization within myself that I was generally not what this person had said about me. Also, as is human nature, I talked to people who genuinely care for me and know me better than anyone, not to mention, the people that would "tell it to me like it is". Again, it was confirmed that generally I was not this way.



However, what I came to grips with, within myself, was that I had tendencies to be what this person accused at one point or another. I definitely have the capacity within me to be a lot of things...I am, after all, human. So, I came to the conclusion that however far stretched this comment was, there could be some truth to it and I could be better. Not for this person, not for anyone else, but for me and the Lord.



This experience has made me realize that I want to be able stand up and be a little bit better than I was before. There is always room for improvement and I wanted to take this negative experience and use it as motivation to be a better person.



All of this introspective thinking coincided nicely with Conference weekend, where I was able to hear a lot of great counsel on things that I wanted to work on. I feel a lot of peace and hope when I think of the Saviors Atonement, and the opportunity that it gives me everyday to wake up and be just a little bit better than I was the day before. The point is, that I have to take those opportunities, press forward and CHOOSE to be better. And the Lord has promised that this peace will multiply ten fold if we make those small efforts:

"Be of good comfort, be of one mind, live in peace; and the God of love and peace shall be with you." ~ 2 Corinthians 13:11

President Hinkcley said on this matter: "We are all this together, all of us, and we have a great work to do.
Every teacher can be a better teacher than he or she is today.
Every officer can be a better officer than he or she is today.
Every father can be a better father.
Every mother can be a better mother.
Every husband can be a better husband, ever wife a better wife, every child a better child.
We are on the road that leads to immortality and eternal life and today is a part of it. Let us never forget it."

I can actually now say I am grateful for what I heard. I hold no malice for the person who said it. As I said, I don't feel this person, who is a good person, would have ever wanted me to hear what they said. It's funny how the same things in life that can tear us down and have the capacity to lead towards negativity also have the ability to be those things that mold and change us into better people. It all depends on perspective and how we use these experiences in my life.

Wow, if I think about all the negative situations I've been in, in this capacity, I can't imagine the amazing lessons I might have learned, while instead I dwelt on them as purely negative experiences. I have a lot to make up for.

And I'm going to start with trying to be a little better...today.

LDS General Conference

I have just finished listening to the 1st session this morning of our semi-annual General Broadcast for the church I belong to, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. For those of you who don't know what this conference is, its a conference in the months of April and October in which we receive counsel, inspiration, guidance and direction from the leaders of church. Our loving prophet, the Lords apostles, and other general leadership of the church. It's something that I look forward to so greatly and when I heard the Mormon Tabernacle Choir singing, "High On The Mountain Top" at the opening of the session, my eyes welled with tears, soley because of my gratitude for my knowledge of the Gospel and the fact that I have been blessed to have always had it in my life. Definitely throughout my life General Conference has been something I have taken for granted, but I just am so grateful that our loving Father in Heaven has allowed us the opportunity to participate in this wonderful conference, and in a time of such gloom and despair, feel our faith and hopes renewed.

So, with that, my only message today is that I invite you, if you aren't already, to listen to the messages of this conference. You can do so by viewing it on TV. It's broadcasted on the BYU channel (which is 374 for DirecTV...I'm unsure of other companies), on public service channels, livestream over the internet at WWW.LDS.ORG or at any LDS church building. Transcripts and video clips of this conference will also be available for reading and viewing after this conference on the church website within the days following the conference.

This conference is for THE WORLD, not only for the current members of our church. This post is soley an invitation to find strength within something that fills my soul with strength beyond words.

A Tradition of Happiness and Love

If you are like me the fall season is a feeling. Even though in my neck of the woods its still relatively warm for nearing October, I can still feel it is fall and I can't help but get that nostalgic pull to pumpkins and the obsessiveness with colors like orange, brown and hunter green. I can't even walk around stores like Target right now without wanting to buy up all of the Halloween and fall decorations. In fact, I came home from Target with a solitary bag of pretend leaves just because it was in the dollar section and I wanted to buy something that felt like fall. Part of it I think is because we've had our fill with the scorching heat...and the feeling of the holidays right around the corner fills the air with excitement. For me its always been special because my birthday is in fall and now so is my baby's, so it's an extra special time.

I was thinking about it today and this time of year reminds me of family and tradition. Last year for my birthday, a friend gave me a wonderful book called, Heaven's Touch: A Tribute to Women, featuring art by Greg Olsen. He is one of my absolute favorites. The above picture is actually one of his from his "Childhood" collection. I found this picture in my book and so I went on Greg Olsen's website to search for it. I loved the description of the picture, called "Fall Leaves". It reads, "These young children are in the enviable state of not yet having learned that raking leaves is supposed to be work. They have turned a chore into pure fun. The reward of their raking is the creation of a mountain of leaves large and soft enough to catch them as they jump from the branches of the tree above. All this, while a neighbor leans on a rake in his garden in front of a trash pile of burning leaves. Greg Olsen - 2006"

So, it got me thinking about the importance of family time and the pure joy and happiness that can be created in the culture of any particular family. And I think it really is that...an individual "culture". More than anything else in the world, we remember how things were done in our home growing up. The effects our upbringing and homelife have on us, is arguably more effective than any other experience in life. It is during a crucial time where we are learning about life and discovering who we are.

The quote that went along in my book with Greg Olsen's picture was one from prophet Joseph F. Smith. He said, "There can be no genuine happiness separate and aprt from the home....There is no happiness without service, and there is no service greater than that which converts the home into a divine institution, and which promotes and preserves family life....The strongest attachments of childhood are those that cluster about the home, and the dearest memories of old age are those that call up the associations of youth and its happy surroundings."

What better way is there then, as parents, to make those few short years a positive and memorable experience, than creating family traditions? Definitely, specific holidays and times of year remind us of certain traditions, which is why I bring it up now. Certainly though, there are everyday traditions that can and should be established in a home like family scripture study, prayer...family home evening on a weekly basis, attending church services together, enjoying at least one meal a day all together at the dinner table enjoying one anothers company, etc. For example, one mine and my husband's traditions since we were dating is that we go on evening walks. We've always loved to go on walks together...(or a run), but its something that we plan on continuing with our children as often as possible throughout the week. I am sure there will be times, when we have teenagers that they will not be as happy to go on the walks as they once were, (just ask my dad about trying to get me to go on bike rides with the family at sixteen years old. I mean, seriously, seven plus bikes riding down the street...helmets and all, and I swear he'd go right in front of my friends' houses just to drive me nuts, haha) but I'm hoping that creating this tradition in our "family culture" will help to cultivate our relationships and teach them that family togetherness and quality time is important.

This is something important to my husband and I because we learned it from very loving parents who knew that family time was important. It wasn't always expensive trips or extravagant events...but they were significant enough that it imprinted in our hearts the importance of this family time.

Getting back to this time of year, I wanted to share some of our families traditions. Some of them more "typical" some of them more "sentimental". I think for my husband's family, the food they've made at certain holidays has become significantly sentimental. What is a Thanksgiving dinner without Mom's homemade rolls? Pumpkin pie will always remind us of his dear grandpa, who even in his very ill days, would enjoy a piece because it was his favorite. Going around the table before eating on Thanksgiving to express what we are thankful for. The beautiful table settings and display of food that looks to gorgeous to even eat. The matching pajama's on Christmas for all of the great-grandchildren from Great Grandma. The list goes on and on.

For my family, it has always been a tradition that on Christmas morning, before going out to the Christmas tree, we stood oldest to youngest and covered the eyes of the one in front of us to walk out. Dad always makes a fabulous Christmas morning breakfast. Mom always makes fudge and english toffee. The race to find Baby Jesus within the mounds of packing popcorn in the box of the Nativity set. Chris Mouse and his microphone to Santa Claus to make sure we were being good little boys and girls. The letters we would write to him and the notes we would get back on tiny stationary. We used to leave him cheese and he would nibble it down leaving only crumbs...or a stick to come back and see "mouse bites". (I can't believe the effort Mom and Dad put in for us to have the Spirit of Christmas. They truly love us).

All of these times have created memories that we will never forget, and we hope to continue on with our children. Ultimately, it doesn't matter what the specific tradition is, as long as there is a pattern of love in our homes and the things that we do as a family, I hope that they will look back on their upbringing with happiness and love. And if we acheive that, there will be no greater accomplishment. Because as David O. McKay said, “No other success can compensate for failure in the home.”

If you feel so inclined, I'd love to hear of your family traditions (or ones you hope to start) that you'd like to share. I love hearing from you...I plan on getting better at commenting back. Nonetheless, I read them all and getting your insight and comments makes my day.

Stretchmarks

My husband and I have been running every night. We've been coming home and lifting weights. We've been eating healthily and have been successful in staying focused on our program. We are slowly but surely seeing and feeling the results which is a phenomenal reward for our hard work. However, last night, we were checking ourselves out in our closet mirror (don't pretend you don't do the same after a work out...you flex as if you'll actually see an instantaneous result from that very days efforts! haha). I started to complain to my husband, "When the heck did I get hips??" Definitely, I have born a child. Just ask my backside. "No matter how many crunches I do, the stretchmarks will always remain." (Unless one day in the distant future I go under the knife for a tummy tuck.) As he empathized and gave me the typical sweet husband responses of, "I think you're beautiful..." etc., (I love him so much, by the way)... I responded still somewhat negatively with, "You're lucky that you're a guy, because your body is not permanantly changed just from becoming a father!" He, however begged to differ and pointed as his belly saying, "My body has changed since becoming a dad; problem is, I had complete control. You didn't." (Again, I love him so.)

Anyway, as I said the words, "You're lucky" I instantaneously felt guilty...truly, the joy of conceiving, carrying and bearing a child, is my most cherished accomplishment, some of my fondest memories, a divine gift...and something I do actually look forward to doing again a few more times. And I thought of my stretchmarks finally as the "stripes of honor" that people joke about. But, this time, to me it didn't feel like a joke. And I started to think of why I got stretch marks. Well, I did gain a little over what I needed and I was insanely swollen due to hypertension, but ultimately, stretchmarks come when your body is getting bigger faster than your skin thought you would be. Basically.

Then I started thinking...I hope that my soul has stretchmarks. I know that sounds silly, and utterly impossible since your soul isn't something physical. But, I hope that my soul has stretchmarks, figuratively speaking. As human beings, in our general nature we have a drive inside of us to press forward. This drive motivates us to be better and stronger. To acheive beyond our personal limits and accomplish. At times we are more motivated than others, but generally, none of us get up in the morning and say, "I don't want to do better. I want to be a worse person than I was yesterday." (At least, I hope none of us say that.)

So, everyday, we try to push ourselves just a little bit harder...stretch our bodies, our hearts, our souls to reach beyond the limits. This is where I get my silly notion of hoping that my soul has stretchmarks. I want to feel like I am stretching every day...beyond the capacities that I even thought I could be, therefore creating stretchmarks, a.k.a. stripes of honor. And the state of our souls should matter more than our physical state, because ultimately, one keeps eternally, and one does not.

"Though our outward man perish, yet the inward man is renewed day by day." ~2 Corinthians 4:16

Everday our bodies get older...the outward man does perish. Deteriorates. Thankfully, its relatively slow, but inevitable nonetheless.

Our soul does not deteriorate, rather it is replenished, renewed, strengthened...STRETCHED!

President Hinckley said, "We can improve, and when all is said and done that's what this is all about: improvement, changing our lives so that we can help people change their lives and be better; building Zion on the earth."

I hope my soul is covered in stretchmarks. I know that if it is, some are self inflicted but many are the product of others helping me to grow. Thank you for that.

Learning to love my physical stretchmarks may be a constant battle...a love/hate relationship if you will. Sometimes (most of the time, to be honest) I will want to to wish them away. But my spiritual stretchmarks, the ones I've earned and hope to earn, I hope that those stay eternally...and continue to multiply. Because we've all earned those ones too, as our "stripes of honor". Each and every one.

Get Real

I can't sleep. 1AM on a Friday night...and I will freely admit, its because I am too full to relax. I ate like a BIG NASTY tonight on a "Girls Night Out". I mean, I don't even want to estimate the calories...but I'm sick. Bleh. And it's been this way for 2+ hours now...go away.

Well, as I try to digest, I'll type to get my mind off of the dizziness of my bursting stomach. I've had something on my mind tonight. I have turned over a new leaf in my life the past few months. I've decided to "GET REAL". And by that, I mean, I decided to be true to myself. I have spent much of my life trying to be someone for someone else...to make others happy. I LOVE to make others happy...especially those I love, and usually that love and happiness is reciprocated. That's called healthy relationships. That, I have not changed. I still very much live to show those I love the service and happiness they deserve for making me the happy and blessed person I am.

What I have changed is trying to make people who don't care if they are making me happy, happy. Make sense? Of course it does, because you all know what I'm talking about. We're talking about being fake, people. I mean, we all do it at one point or another. And sometimes its not intended but we concern ourselves SO much with impressing others or not wanting to offend someone, that we put our own thoughts, feelings, desires...EVERYTHING aside, to make others feel more comfortable. All the while, we are not being true to them or ourselves.

And frankly, I have had ENOUGH of it! I am me...this is who I am. I ate 20,000 calories tonight. Sometimes money is tight and we worry how we'll pay our bills. Sometimes, I go ballistic from stress or lack of sleep or for no real apparent reason at all. Sometimes I curl in a ball on the floor and cry when its that time of month. I weigh myself daily because I have issues with it. I watch MTV reality shows sometimes. I secretly dream of being a super star and sing in the mirror with my hair brush. Oh, the list goes on and on of things that aren't easily admitted. And its okay to admit it, because I am human, and I know all of you out there have your quirks too. It's okay to be real. We don't have to be THAT real all of the time, but you get the point.

And it's okay to love yourself for those things. It's okay to be proud of yourself. I've recently discovered that there are things I really like about myself. I have discovered that I think some things about my looks are really pretty. I have musical talents that I am proud of. I feel I am a good person. I am successful in my life because I try everyday. And a recent development...I am REAL.

I have discovered in trying to be me for me and the people that really love me, that I love myself more than I ever thought. I measured my own happiness and my own self worth on what other people thought of me, and therefore thought that I always had to be better. But for who? I've discovered it was not for me. It was for people that I was never, ever going to please. Because people like that are not pleased with themselves, and they want you to feel that same feeling of defeat. No more...I want to give myself credit, by myself, for myself.

I looked for validation in every possible area. Every one's opinion had to be calculated until I could decide how I "really felt". I couldn't be impressed with myself until someone else measured the worth of my achievements for me. It's a depressing way to live. I want to walk into a room and feel beautiful because I just looked at myself in a mirror and I thought I looked beautiful...not because ten heads did or didn't turn as I walked in.

It's possible to have that feeling. I am just catching the glimpse of it, and let me tell you, it is a magnificent sight to see.

I did not bring myself to this point. Those in my life who really love me, who really cared about me, forced me to this point. Short of shaking sense into me, people like my husband and my sister in particular (who are both very real people, by the way) forced me to see that I was killing myself from the inside with the craziness of trying to be something to everyone. It was a lie. You can't be something to everyone. Once you are true to yourself...once you decide that you are going to be you for you, and no one else, the evidence that we all are trapped in that same nightmare of acceptance comes out, and has a rippling effect.

"When a woman tells the truth she is creating the possibility for more truth around her." ~Adrienne Rich

If you seek out to be true to yourself, then you will find those around you who want that too. And you will weed out those who don't.

Because if you are not true to who you are, you are betraying yourself in the worst way possible. And your whole purpose for betraying yourself, to be everything for everyone else, is a catch 22 that will come back to bite you, because how can you be true to others, if you can't be true to yourself?

"If one is estranged from oneself, then one is estranged from others too. If one is out of touch with oneself, then one cannot touch others." ~Anne Morrow Lindbergh

"A man who doesn't trust himself can never really trust anyone else." ~Cardinal De Retz

And if that costs you friends, relationships, etc, what is more important? The relationship built upon superficial lies, or your own self-respect and self-worth?

"I prefer to be true to myself, even at the hazard of incurring the ridicule of others, rather than to be false, and to incur my own abhorrence." ~Frederick Douglass

And there-in, in that self respect, you will find exactly what you need to be the best you. The one you were striving to be from the very beginning. And that best you, the one always trying to progress to be better and share that light, will accomplish volumes more than the persona that was once the role you played, could have ever dreamed.

"To free us from the expectations of others, to give us back to ourselves--there lies the great, singular power of self-respect."~Joan Didion

I am barely breaking the surface of my new-found freedom, but I am at a point where I am comfortable with myself and as Mark Twain said, "The worst loneliness is to not be comfortable with yourself."

It is the truth. Because you are the one that will lay in bed at night worrying about what others think. You will be the one bending over backwards for people that would never think twice to do the same for you. That loneliness will eat a hole inside you that will never be filled by those acts of self destruction.

I am me. I have always been me...deep inside. Don't get me wrong...I am not a completely different person...who I was wasn't a facade or role I played completely. I was a good person then, too. The personas we play are derivatives of who we really are inside. It's when we start to cater to our own feelings and desires instead of those who are impossible to please, that we can be comfortable to admit and be who we really are and who we really want to be.

And in this discovery of my reality, I have found that I am more respected by those in my life for it. And those who do not respect it, do not need to be in my life. But like I said, I have found human nature is generally kind and accepting. It's what we don't like about ourselves that we point out in others. None of us need fingers pointed at us...we do it enough to ourselves.

This post felt more like a soap box then I've ever felt before. It's not meant to be. I don't know, maybe because its almost 2 am...and I'm getting delirious, I just made myself sound like a babbling idiot. But two things I know for certain, I am happier with who I am today than I ever have been in my life...and I'm STILL insanely full.

Study Suggestions and A Personal Challenge

K, all three of you out there...I have a question for you. :) )And if there are more out there hiding, I'd love your advice as well...anytime.)

I have made a habit of being pretty self deprecating and brutally honest about my shortcomings on this blog, so I guess why hold back now.

I'M HORRIBLE AT SCRIPTURE STUDY!

There. I've said it. Sometimes they say when you admit it you feel better. I actually don't. Maybe I will if you can help me and something actually comes from this admittance of one of my most private weaknesses.

I try, really I do. I have the best intentions, but for some reason, it never sticks like I expect it to. I always feel like I've found the best method for me, but I fall out of a routine pretty quickly. I kind of lose faith in myself and my ability to keep up with things I know I should be doing. I mean, I always keep trying, I never give up...how can I? I know they are true, I find such joy in reading...I could read through conference talks and gospel topic books for days...but honestly, sometimes the scriptural languages is harder to catch onto.

I have a friend, who is such an example to me...I kept trying to get her to read this fictional series I was reading and she said she didn't want to start reading until she finished with the scriptures. Her method was, she read them like a book. It wasn't like a set number of chapters a night...she just read them like you'd read a novel...until you decided to put it down for the night.

I've done this...and its a good method. I've also been trying to follow the Sunday School schedule. It really comes in handy for Gospel Doctrine when you actually read what you are talking about. This is a good method too. I've also heard of people that reference and study specific topics. Or skip around from book to book.

I probably have the wrong attitude about it...and I don't want it to come off like I want it to be some game, but I just wondered if any of you have had a specific method that has had an affect on you and has therefore increased your love of the scriptures and desire to study. I'd LOVE to hear your experiences.

Remember, you can post anonymously.

Ultimately, I want to follow the prophet Gordon B. Hinckley's counsel, "Let us establish in our lives the habit of reading those things which will strengthen our faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, the Savior of the world."

What I need is for it to be more of a priority...a habit. Something I do without question. And I will always continue to try, even if its an uphill battle for the rest of my life.

Secondly, I was thinking about the movie "Pay It Forward" with that kid from "The Sixth Sense", Haley Joel Osment or something, Helen Hunt and Kevin Spacey. Have you seen it?? It's amazing...great message. The jist is, you pay forward good deeds. Acts of kindness and its a trickling effect. Kind of like the Liberty Mutual commerical also...have you seen that? Pretty cool. Anyway, I am challenging myself and any of you who want to challenge yourselves (people make changes in themselves better than other people asking them to)...to make a difference today. Somewhere. To somebody.

"I give unto you to be the light of this people. A city that is set on a hill cannot be hid."~3 Nephi 12:14

Let your light so shine...so that we all might help each other see the pure joy and beauty that is life and loving one another.